Lean and Green v/s Mean and... Glossy Sheen

Have you ever wondered who would win the fight between Juggernaut and The Hulk? I personally would go with Juggernaut, but I can see other goin' for the Hulk. Juggernaut is part of the X-Men line of comics, while the Hulk is just a regular Marvel character. There is an instance in the comics where these characters fight, and I think it was broken up by other X-Men. Let's look at both sides:
The Hulk/Juggernaut
Temporary Power Supplied by Radiation based on degree of anger/Power supplied by a Magic Crystal & Injection
Super Strong (Draw)/ Super Strong (Draw)
Regeneration/ Unstoppable Momentum (Win)
Radiation Damage Resistance/Damage Resistance (Win) Mental Resistance(w/ helmet on)
Wimpy but Smart Secret Identity (Draw)/ No Secret Identity (Draw)
Hero(Draw)/ Villian (Draw)
Little Control in Hulk Form/ Total Control (Win)
Cool Transformation (Win)/ Cool Appearance
Ripped Purple Shorts/ Cool Metal Armor Type Thing (Win)

In the end, in my opinion, Juggernaut is the better/cooler of the two characters. Granted, I still wouldn't want to get in a fight with The Hulk, but he loses this match. See you guys next time for another edition of USUCC (Ultimate Super Ultra Cool Characters)

Good evening, i'm Blastoise, and you're not.

Have any of you watched SNL recently? Because I haven't. It's just not funny anymore. Sure, some skits are mildly amusing, but that's about it.I mean, what happened? Where'd all the comedians go? Chevy Chase, Dan Aykroyd, Mike Myers, Chris Farley, and Will Ferrell were the best in the business for laughs, now it's that one guy, the one with the nose and curly hair. The show used to be the only thing I looked forward to Saturday night, now it's something that seems like a chore to watch. All good things come to an end, I guess, but now what? MADTV? It's ok, but...

Take me to where the girls are green and the grass is pretty

You know that Marvel character She-Hulk? What's goin' on there? Is she like his daughter or something? I mean, she looks like a regular person, just buff and of course, green. She kinda reminds me of that Mortal Kombat character, you know, the lady-thing with 4 arms? I mean, they're both super strong, the only differences are the number of arms, the color of their skin, and their hairdo. Who would win if the two fought? I think She-Hulk would, just because she is smarter. She'd probably lead her into a trap or something like that. But the MK character would probably try to go all Highlander on her. Maybe it'd be a tie, but I doubt it. It's kinda like matching up Juggernaut with the Hulk. But that's another blog. For now, just think about who would win.

How can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?!

Time for music quiz ranging from 1700-1996! Songs will be presented, and you have to answer who they are by. There is a bonus question at the end. (No Wikipedia or Google)

1700's
"Lone Ranger Theme" by?
1900's
"My Way" by?
"White Rabbit" by?
"Light my Fire" by?
"Brick in the Wall pt.1&2" by?
"Smells Like Teen Spirit" by?
"Eye of the Tiger" by?
"Sweet Child O' Mine" by?
"Dude Looks Like a Lady" by?

Bonus Round:
Name two artists/groups who have covered "Come Together".

Mr. Owl, why are you a jerk?

You know the old commercials about the tootsie pops and how many lick does it take to get to the center of one? Well, the owl says its three, but it's not! I had an experiment many years ago with 3 of my friends. We all had the same size and flavor tootsie pop (red), and we all licked it until we got to the center. The results were: I had 237 licks, Friend A had 319 licks, Friend B had 276 licks, and Friend C had 453 licks. So, as my experiment has proven, it most definitively does not take just 3 licks to get to the center of the lollipop, just 4 or 5... hundred.

Bend over for the soap!

Recently I posed a question to my friends: Fight Club or Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls. There were mixed responses, but the winner was Ace. Naturally, I chose the latter. Sure, Fight Club presents a dark comedy about the corrupting greed and material consumerism that runs rampant these days while at the same time posing as a satire of society with commendable acting and a beautifully written story line, but Ace Ventura is super-mega ultra double deluxe hilarious! How is a mechanical rhinoceros giving birth to a naked Jim Carrey while a family is watching not funny? Both are movies to be remembered, but when it comes to slapstick and Edward Norton, slapstick wins. (Fight Club: Now on Blu-Ray!)

By the power of internet sites that have free shows!

Do you remember all the shows you used to watch when you were a kid? I do! Thundercats, Transformers, TMNT, Beetlejuice, Johnny Bravo, Animaniacs, Duck Tales, Smurfs, Voltron, Muppets, Gargoyles, Sailor Moon... the list could go on! All of these cartoons I watched till my eyeballs burned. These cartoons were awesome, entertaining, comical, and violent. Cartoons that show today are only shadows of what were. Most are stupid (not the good kind) and boring, and are just pathetic remakes of other shows. But you can still see these works of art on Boomerang, or on Demand. Now, to do what we do every day: Take over the world (or at least Nebraska).

Guns n' ... Moses? Or My BioChemical France?

I talked to some random people the other day, and we discussed music. I talked about GNR, Aerosmith, Jefferson Airplane, and Billy Idol. They talked about My Chemical Romance, and some Bullets for my Valentine. Naturally, they had no idea who I was talking about, and vice-versa. So then I listened to these musical groups. I regretted my decision immediately. The things that pass for music these days is just sad. What happened to making yourself sound cool and manly instead of whiny, wheezy, and sucky. Plus, some of the guitar riffs sound like you can do it with an Activision Guitar. That's why modern music sucks. Oh, and the "band" names sucks. (Fallout Boy? WTF? As in Fallout 3's Pip Boy?)

I Be or I don't Be

Have you noticed the way kids are talkin' nowadays? They slur words, don't enunciate, and use words improperly. I can understand them about as much as I can understand Shakespeare. For example, take a random kid and tell him to speak: "Yo dog, I got a new grill from my freezer and it only shot double bills!" and Shakespeare: "But soft! What light through yonder window breaks! It is the East, and Juliet is the sun." See what I mean? They're interchangeable! "Yo homie! What be up with thou? Hast thine laid eyes upon my new hoe?" That, ladies and gents, is the epitome in the decline of modern education. Naw meen?

American "Billy" Idol

I just watched American Idol the other day, not that I watch it continuously (or at all), and it was freakin' hilarious! Most of the individuals had no musical talent, and their auditions were most entertaining. Not that I have any talent that outshines. I mean, when a friend & I sing "Sweet Child O' Mine" it sounds like the Bee Gees with a sore throat. Or when we sing "Wanted Dead or Alive", it sounds like Jon got slugged in the stomach. But we do an okay Pokemon and Jefferson's Theme. Anyway, like I said, this show is good for a timekiller, but not to watch all the time, though my family watches it like crazy. The show has offered one golden egg, however, when William Hung sang, "She Bang". (Yes that asian guy with bad teeth.)

Big, meaty, juicy rubbers...

Revolutions come in all forms, and one of the most important has happened in our lifetime. The Chewing Gum industry has evolved over the past few years, what with new flavors and packaging. The flavors have progressed and diversified to include new twists on old flavors. Take for example the ever popular mint. Companies have made it so that it has a nice new hint of bubble gum flavor, or other taste. Aside from flavoring, the containers have changed drastically. Though some still come in the old-school 5 stick packages, most now come in the form of user-friendly 15-stick packs. My personal favorite used to be juicy fruit, but now it's 5 Flare Chewing Gum. This gum has a nice chew rate, smooth long-lasting taste, and a nice container. These factors combine to make an extraordinary experience by simply masticating unvulcanised butyl rubber.

How do you like me now?

I was sitting in class mindidng my own business, and my friend tells me about a game. The object of this game is not to think about it at all. If you do think about "The Game", you lose. Try to not think about it as long as possible. If you do think about it, you have to announce your loss in some way to at least one person, and you have 30 seconds to forget about The Game. Then I thought, this game is completely pointless...and awesome! So I now play The Game, which I just lost.

( P.S. By the way, you just lost the game. You now have 30 seconds to forget about it. 30, 29, 28...)

Critical Hit!

I was playing my pokemon game the other day and noticed something. Have you ever noticed how the strongest pokemon attacks always miss when you need them most? I was using Hydro Pump (with Blastoise of course) against a level 100 Dragonite and it missed! Then he used slash for a critical hit and I lost! I would have killed him but I missed. Come on! Then, I used Hyper Beam with Snorlax against a Gyarados and missed! WTF happened?! I know Pokemon is a probability-influenced game, but that just sucks. When these attacks miss, rest assured that you will not beat the Elite Four, or any other strong trainer for that matter.